Things that make me angry #2

Karl Rove gave me a birthday present.  Awwww, how sweet:

Instead, Democrats want to spend $88 billion to increase the federal share of Medicaid. What American will be hired by a small business, factory, retail shop, hotel, restaurant or service company because of this spending? The answer is very few.

In H.R. 1, there’s $41 billion set aside for school districts, $1.5 billion for university research grants, $2 billion for Energy Department labs, and $3 billion for the National Science Foundation. Yet education is one of the few sectors that added jobs last year.

There’s also $4 billion for health programs like obesity control and smoking cessation, $2 billion for the National Institutes of Health, $462 million for the Centers for Disease Control, and $900 million for pandemic flu preparations. Health care also added jobs last year.

Dear Karl Rove.  I know we disagree on fundamental things, like education, the effectiveness of torture, your hair, and little things like judicial process.

All this I can understand and somewhat enjoy, as it provides me such bountiful fodder to mock.  But here I am actually somewhat befuddled.  In almost one breath you mock the stimulus plan for not creating jobs… and then point out that it’s giving money to industries which create jobs?  I mean, we’re not talkin’ greedy corporations here, we’re talking about two of the most underfunded industries we have (just ask anyone who is a) a teacher, b) a student or c) an ER intern with $280,000 of debt).   Screw them anyways, capitalism only works when power is amassed in a few monopolies and oligopolies anyways.  And yet… let’s not give money to larger projects like, oh, hospitals and research labs which are, oh, you know, growing?

No, no. Screw moving forward in industry and the global market game. Let’s just fund the rickshaw industry instead.  ‘Cuz I hear there’s a high demand for American-made rickshaws.

Uh….

Don’t get me wrong, this stimulus bill isn’t perfect. I’ll admit that I’m somewhat of a dork and have read a good portion of the 647 pages of the bill the house passed (Sidenote: NASA would get $2mil for oversight. Dude. Seriously. We’ve got to start respecting NASA again. SCIENCEYAY!), and this is a lot like a “Kitchen Sink” bill.  But really… that’s because a lot of this “Kitchen Sink” stuff creates jobs, both short and long term.

No, giving money to the National Parks and the NEA doesn’t put people into retail jobs… until you realize that someone has to be working in the shops and hotels near Yellowstone, which itself can improve its roads, trails, and marketing to attract tourists (and provide jobs for [people in doing so).  And if I’m not mistaken, tourism… helps the economy, is it?

The public is looking for something so shockingly grotesque in dollar amount that they feel slightly more secure in spending money again.  Remember when $700 Billion seemed like a made up number 3 months ago? Oooh times. How changed you are.  Oooh economy. How cyclical you are.

And education (Pell Grants)?  Really? We’re really going to beat up on education for getting money?  Because deargodknows education neva’ did nothin’ fo’ noone in gettin’ dem jobs.  No one will ever open a small business if they can access education!!!  HEALTH CARE?! Screw funding both healing people and creating jobs in one swoop. I suppose if we just let everyone die (especially poor people) it’s like natural selection, right?

No, Karl Rove, you’re right.  Let’s bail out those poor CEO’s making $10mil a year.  I do weep for them. How draconian.

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