Posts tagged Duggars

Things that freak my shit out

Here’s the thing. I like to think – and I probably give myself too much credit – I’m fairly open about lifestyles.  Although admittedly, after a recent conversation, I have found that I do draw the line at beastiality, mostly because it’s just cruel to animals.

But there’s something that just pushes my buttons: THE DUGGAR FAMILY.

I’ve obsessively kept track of this family with gapers block-esque disbelief through TLC Specials/shows as their numbers have swelled from mid-teens to now the inconceivable number of 20 members. Every time I watch an episode of their show my “creeped-outness” meter explodes, and I usually yell out loud at the television at least once.  Plus, I inevitably have repeated flashbacks to that Harvey Danger lyric: “I’ve been around the world and found that only stupid people are breeding.”

And then I feel guilty for not being open minded enough.

So if you’ve paid attention to the Duggar family at all (and I really hope you haven’t, but I commiserate with the I CAN’T TURN AWAY FROM THE TV feeling), you know they are an uber-religious family who has decided God is responsible for providing them with as many children as He wants them to have. Ergo, their 18 current.  To be honest, any sort of blind religious fanaticism like this somewhat irks my annoyance radar, but I understand I’m a product of a Dogma-Generation (read: In err, we’ve taken a set of good ideas and made a belief system), and most of the time I can accept such monomaniacal religious beliefs with a grain of salt.

Sidenote: my well-meaning but Born-Again Christian aunt just gave me a copy of The Shack for my birthday. Oh joy.

Anyways, my recent freak-my-shit-out moment with the Duggars occurred when the eldest son, Josh Duggar, married the girl he was ‘courting,’ Anna.  As a feminist and member of the 21st century, I resent the paternalistic and condescending implications of any “courting,” especially in the brain-washed way the episode portrays it.  According to the Duggars and the Kellers (Anna’s family don’t judge that I know her last name pleasethanks), after one is engaged, they may officially begin to go out in public together, but must have chaperons any time they are together so they don’t GIVE INTO THEIR OVERWHELMING DESIRES AND GODFORBID KISS BEFORE THEIR WEDDING GAAAAAAASP.

Now, I know several friends and couples who have chosen not to have sex before marriage. I admire and appreciate their reasoning, religiously and otherwised based, for that decision.  And I can almost handle the whole Duggar-Keller not-kissing thing… if it wasn’t so fucking Children-of-the-Damned-like on the show. The internet tells me there’s (surprisingly, to me) a decently-sized movement to this No-Kissing thing (admittedly I know 2 people who have decided to save their first kiss for their wedding day).  But the true zombieosity of this concept meant it took me a long time to process through and accept.

Yet, after several months and more internet time & research wasted than should have been, I’ve come to peace with it.

But there is one thing I just cannot handle or understand.

Dear Josh and Anna Duggar:
Although I disagree with you, I respect your choices regarding life, marriage and child-rearing. But there’s one thing I need you to answer.  WHY THE FUCK DO YOU ALWAYS DRESS ALIKE????? TERRIFIED MINDS WANT TO KNOW!!!
Kthxbye,
Terrified Minds

No, seriously, someone explain this shit to me, because, in a rare moment, the internet fucking fails to provide me even a fake answer:

Brown Stripies!

Brown Stripies!

Blue!

Blue!

White and Kakhis!

White and Kakhis!

I promise you, although I can find no further pictures to post, this penchant for twin-dressing is the norm when they are on screen.  Seriously… why? I want to know. I could understand it if you were siblings being dressed by your parents.  BUT YOU’RE NOT.  You [claim you] are adults, so why must you wear the exact. same. striped. shirts?

Help. Someone. Please.  Shed light. Please.

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